DAYEdalera

2 araw na lang hindi pa rin ako desidido. Paano ba naman August 25 ko lang natapos basahin ang coverage. Lahat FIRST READING. Pilosopo ako kaya ang sabi ko.. "Sa simbahan nga hanggang Second Reading lang eh..hihigitan ko pa ba yun?"

August 31, nagtataka ako..bakit hindi ako kinakabahan? Dapat sa mga oras na yun tensyonado na ako. 2 araw na lang, shutdown ang utak ko, di na makapagbasa at mas inuna ko pa manood ng game ka na ba?... Yan ang sitwasyon bago ko tawagan ng mga Dementors.. Unti-unti bumaba ang confidence ko. Umiyak ako maghapon.

September na! Aga ko sa UST, 8am sharp. Di na ako nagpaalam sa mga kasambahay kc ayaw kong maging emotional pag nag-gudluck sila..

SEND-OFF: I attended the mass. Akalain mo nahatak pa ako magpray ng offertory prayers. I was at peace during the mass pero nung send-off ceremony na, kasabay ng malalakas na tambol at hiyawan ng mga estudyante, KINABOG and dibdib ko. Handa na ba ako? Salamat na lang sa mga kaibigan na nagpunta sa hotel para magpalakas ng loob.

FIRST SUNDAY: Political Law/Labor Law

Di ako kinakabahan pagpasok ko ng DLSU. Political Law ang unang exam sa paniniwala ko hindi posible na mabokya ako dito. Nagulat lang ako, kung bakit di current events ang issue sa mga tanong. Handa pa naman ako sa Poli law updates. Sa palagay ko nakasagot naman ako ng maayos 'yun nga lang palya yata yung sentence construction ko. Naexcite kasi ako eh!

Sa Labor law, unang tanong pa lang gusto ko na isoli yung booklet at test question. Number 1 question: What is the Principle of Codetermination and it's Constitutional basis. What?! Sa limang taon ko sa law skul ngayon ko lang 'yun narinig. Nilakasan ko ang loob ko at nanghula ng sagot sabay wish na sana pag nakita ng examiner ang answer ko sa Q1 hindi nya ako i-DQ.

Generally, my first Sunday is ok. On the second thought, pwede pa ako bumawi sa 3 linggo pang susunod.

SECOND SUNDAY: Civil Law and Taxation

Ngayon siningil na ako ng kaba. Paano ba naman, magkapares ang subjects na sa palagay ko pinakamahina ako. Saka idagdag na rin na sa sobrang takot ko sa Tax, apat na araw ko yun binasa, ang Civil law, 1 araw lang. Gabayan sana ako ni Dean A at Justice D habang exam. Di ako komportableng pumasok sa War room. Sa Civil law ang panindak "trust de son tort" pero higit akong nasindak na 1 lang ang tanong sa Family Code, true or false pa. Saka nga pala nadisorient ako, Mercantile na ba? Bakit may insolvency?.

Tax! Grr! Akala ko pa naman handa ako..hindi pala. Pinilit ko sagutan lahat. At least mabigyan man lang ng grade ang effort. Panalangin ko sana di ako ma-DQ. Hindi ko mapilit ang utak ko alalahanin ang tax implications and incidence ng life insurance proceeds at return of premiums. Lintek! parang di ako nagMasters ng Tax kc di ko pa naalala ang period of payment and extension ng Estate tax. Hmppp! Tax is really burdensome.

Ergo, my second sunday is a disaster.

THIRD SUNDAY: Mercantile Law and Criminal Law

Exhausted na ako. Sabik na magpahinga. Yung paghahanda ko para sa third sunday pang prelims lang yata. Sa isip ko, sa dalawang nakalipas na linggo, hindi naman ako sinagip ng mga pinag-aralan ko. Sabi ng mga teachers namin pag may tanong daw automatic "It's all coming back to me now". Totoo kaya ito?

Sa Mercantile law, natapos ko ang mga dapat basahin pero wala ng pagkakataon balikan sa pre-week. Super haba ng coverage at super dami ng Special laws. Hate ko pa naman ang business transactions at negotiable instruments. So sapalaran na kung may maalala ako. Natapos ko naman pero parang hindi swak yung mga sagot ko. Hay!

Criminal law, confident ako. Makatlong beses ko yata nabasa ang GT Crim Notes ni Dean O. at lahat ng lectures ay napuntahan ko. Pero gaya ng sabi ng isang kaibigan dapat daw isuko na ang Crim exam..paano malabo ka makakuha ng mataas na grade dito..Unless, you have a criminal mind. Siyempre dun ako kabilang sa general rule: walang criminal mind, palpak sa criminal law.

My third sunday, Devastating.

FOURTH SUNDAY: Remedial Law and Legal Ethics and Practical Exercises

Wednesday na ako nakapagsimulang mag-aral. Depressed talaga ko sa performance ko ng third sunday. Ayaw ko makipag-usap sa mga dementors, pinagtaguan ko sila lahat.

Remedial law, masaya ako kasi pareho kame ng sagot ni CGM (reliable na student). Unang tanong execution ng foreign judgment, arbitral awards at global injunction...Panindak yun. Mandamus sa violation ng speedy trial right of the accused...Nakakaconfused yun. Isa lang ang siguradong sigurado ako yung Revival of Judgment.. Pero ok lang, at least di ko nafeel na super tanga ko sa procedure.

Legal Ethics, parang katabi ko si Judge A. binubulong yung sagot. Hahaha! pwede ko ba i-claim na ethical ako kaya nadalian ako sa exam na to? Yung mga legal forms na pinaprepare, ok lang pero sayang naman yung kinabisado kong VTPOSJ / TAP-CAP-SA/ TAP-WAC-SA at CAP-TIBRA-PLUS codes para sa mga business forms at judicial pleadings. Anyway, super thanks na din kay Atty. A dahil mas napadali yung pagmemorize ko ng parts of every form.

Last sunday, ok naman. Pero palagay ko hindi kayang bawiin yung mga katangahan ko nung unang mga linggo.

*****

Allow me to recollect thoughts of what traspired after the last exam.'til then.

Labels: 2007 bar exam experience

The last 5 months of my life before the bar exam almost destroyed the thin-like thread between my sanity and insanity.



There are times I am crying or laughing for no reason.
Depression of weight gain and yet eating to the fullest.
Devising means to forget the taste of coffee by mixing chocolait, milk or even soda in it.
Singing the Income Tax provisions of the NIRC.
Although I have heard same stories from already lawyers. I thought mine was worst and the pessimistic ME took it as a negative sign.


Further, as my friend Glad called them "dementors" there are people pushing the button pressure. People I've met in my walk of life.


Family members already calling me "atty".
My Bosses, past and present.Org mates, Former students, et.al.


Bar review is not a totally fun experience. It is a humbling experience.


During the last five months I felt that I am the most fragile person. Never been so prayerful to the extent that every church I passed through I am whispering my prayers for the bar. I doubted myself many times. I lost my self-esteem.

I can't find the "daye" I used to know. The confident. Dare all.
I met my new self. Afraid of failing. Afraid of letting other people know that I am taking the bar exam. Afraid of facing September.

It was during the bar review that I discovered ignorance. Learning certain principles of law which I heard for the first time (probably because the Bar Chairman is fond of uncommon terms).

It was during the bar review that I have accomodated fears of insufficiency. I was a full-time government employee during my law school days. Who studied a maximum of 2 hours a day and struggled to survive the day to day recitation in class. I attended classes even if I am half-prepared. I hardly passed every exam. I hardly pray for the Revalida's. During the bar review my insufficiencies in law school haunted me if I am really prepared to face the battle.

As I counted months into weeks and into days... .I am humbled each day.

A point of no return. It is for me to surpass. No matter what it may cost me. Taking the risk is always rewarding. I am hopeful.


*****
I am slowly recapitulating my experiences for posterity. :)

Labels: bar exam, bar review

I woke up this morning with the strangest feeling. No rush hour to avoid. No office hour to beat. No law books to read. I just woke up and after a few minutes I asked myself "What now?".

Labels: confused